Sometimes we run into a situation that we aren’t happy about, but we aren’t quite sure what to do about it. With all the situations that happen to us, there are many ways to handle them and it is important to find the one that works with the situation that is at hand.
With that in mind, the words “let it be” in counseling have often been used. Sometimes it is not a good time for a confrontation. Sometimes it is not a good time for continuing the argument. Sometimes it is not necessary to have the last word. It is the time to just “let it be.”
The Beatles had a song called “Let it Be” which had some interesting words. “When the night is cloudy, there is still a light that shines on me; Shine on until tomorrow, let it be.” My mother would say to me, “Well, give it a rest, give it a day and then see how you feel about it.” I think there is wisdom in often being quiet, giving problems a day or two, and giving the other person a day or two to do the same. When all the steam of the argument or disagreement has faded away, reason seems to step forward.
In counseling, we often will put a pause in the middle of a heated conversation. We will hand out nuts or chips, but we will create an interrupt. There is purpose to that, and that is to allow each person to re-group, calm down, and keep the conversation from being destructive rather than constructive.
Sometimes it is important to tell someone, “hey give me a bit to think all of this over,” so they know that you’re not leaving just because you’re mad. It is a peaceful way of giving everyone space and time. At other times, it is important to just let things be and give life some time. This isn’t learned over night but it is a good process to learn.
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